How to Stop Letting Money Control You and Start Controlling Your Money

Let’s be real, mama—money stress is exhausting. The constant worrying, the feeling of never having enough, the anxiety every time a bill pops up. It’s draining.

I know what it’s like to feel like money is controlling your life—dictating what you can and can’t do, keeping you up at night, making you feel powerless.

But here’s the truth: Money is just a tool. You are the one in control.

If you’re tired of letting money run the show, it’s time to take your power back. And today, I’m going to show you exactly how to shift from feeling overwhelmed and reactive to feeling in control and confident with your finances.

Step 1: Stop Operating in “Reaction Mode”

Most people handle money reactively instead of proactively. This looks like:

❌ Checking your bank account and hoping you have enough for that bill.
❌ Stressing every time an unexpected expense comes up.
❌ Avoiding looking at your finances because it feels overwhelming.
❌ Feeling like you never have extra money no matter how hard you work.

Sound familiar? That’s reaction mode.

The key to financial freedom is shifting from reacting to money to controlling it with intention.

Step 2: Take a 360° View of Your Finances

The first step to getting control is knowing exactly where you stand. I know it’s tempting to avoid looking at your finances (trust me, I’ve been there), but knowledge is power.

Here’s what I want you to do:

✔ Look at your accounts – Check your bank balances, credit card statements, and debts. Take a deep breath and face it head-on.
✔ Write down your income & expenses – How much money is coming in? Where is it going?
✔ Identify spending habits – Are there patterns? Are there areas where money is slipping away?

This isn’t about feeling guilty—it’s about understanding your financial picture so you can start making empowered decisions.

Step 3: Set Clear, Actionable Financial Goals

If you don’t have a financial plan, your money will always feel out of control. It’s like driving without a destination—how do you know where you’re going?

Your Financial Goals Should Be:

✔ Specific – Instead of “I want to save money,” try “I want to save $500 in the next 3 months.”
✔ Achievable – Set goals that push you but don’t feel impossible.
✔ Prioritized – Focus on one or two key goals at a time (like building an emergency fund or paying down a specific debt).

Here are a few powerful financial goals to start with:

➡ Save $1,000 for emergencies – Even small savings will keep you from relying on credit cards when life happens.
➡ Pay off one high-interest debt – Pick one credit card or loan and go all in on paying it down.
➡ Increase your income by 10-20% – Whether it’s through a raise, a side hustle, or cutting unnecessary expenses, growing your income is a game-changer.

Step 4: Give Every Dollar a Job (A Simple Budgeting Strategy)

Budgeting doesn’t have to be complicated or restrictive. In fact, I want you to think of your budget as your money plan—not a set of rules, but a strategy for telling your money where to go.

Here’s a simple way to structure your budget:

1️⃣ Cover Essentials (50-60%) – Rent/mortgage, food, utilities, transportation, childcare.
2️⃣ Pay Off Debt & Save (20-30%) – This includes building an emergency fund and knocking out debt.
3️⃣ Enjoy Life (10-20%) – Yes, you can (and should!) budget for fun, self-care, and things that bring you joy!

The goal is to be intentional with your spending. When every dollar has a job, money doesn’t just disappear—it starts working for you.

Step 5: Build Financial Confidence Through Smart Money Habits

Confidence with money isn’t something you magically wake up with—it comes from consistent, small habits that build over time.

Simple Habits That Will Change Your Financial Future:

✔ Check Your Accounts Weekly – Stay aware of your financial picture so you can adjust as needed.
✔ Automate Savings & Bills – Set up automatic transfers so you don’t have to think about saving—it just happens.
✔ Use Cash or Debit for Daily Spending – If credit cards are a struggle, switch to cash or debit for daily expenses to avoid overspending.
✔ Educate Yourself – Read financial books, follow money blogs (like this one!), and learn about investing and wealth-building.

The more you engage with your money, the more confident and in control you’ll feel.

Step 6: Shift from Scarcity to Abundance

One of the biggest mindset shifts you have to make is going from “I never have enough” to “I have the ability to create more.”

Instead of:
❌ “I can’t afford this.” → Say: “How can I afford this?”
❌ “I’ll always be in debt.” → Say: “I am actively working toward financial freedom.”
❌ “I’m just not good with money.” → Say: “I am learning how to master my finances.”

Your words and thoughts shape your reality. If you constantly tell yourself you’ll always struggle, you’ll keep making choices that reinforce that belief.

But when you start speaking abundance and confidence over your finances, you begin taking actions that bring wealth into your life.

This Is Your Time to Take Control

Mama, you are stronger than you think.

You are capable of managing your money well.
You are capable of breaking free from financial stress.
You are capable of building wealth—not just for yourself, but for your kids and their future.

It starts with one decision: to take back control.

So tell me—what’s one financial habit you’re committing to this month? Drop a comment below and let’s start shifting your money story together.

And don’t forget to subscribe so you never miss a post—I’m here to help you step into your financial power every step of the way!