6 Signs You Have a Toxic Relationship with Money (And How to Fix It for Good!)

Money—it’s the relationship we can’t break up with, no matter how much we try. Whether we like it or not, we’re financially tied to money every single day. But the real question is: do you have a healthy relationship with it?

If you constantly feel stressed about money, avoid looking at your bank account, or regret your spending choices, you might have an unhealthy money mindset—and it could be holding you back from financial freedom.

As someone who has been through financial struggles, I know what it’s like to feel trapped in bad money habits. The good news? You can rewrite your money story and start making empowered financial decisions. Here are six signs your relationship with money needs a serious reset—and exactly how to fix it.

1. You Always Feel Like You Don’t Have Enough Money

If you constantly say things like, “I’m always broke” or “I can never afford anything,” you may be stuck in a scarcity mindset. This mindset makes you focus on lack rather than opportunity, which keeps you trapped in a cycle of financial frustration.

How to Fix It:

✅ Practice Gratitude for What You Have – Even if you’re not where you want to be financially, focus on what your money is doing for you (paying rent, feeding your family, providing small joys).

✅ Shift from Scarcity to Abundance Thinking – Instead of saying, “I can’t afford it,” try, “How can I afford it?” This tiny mindset shift opens your brain to new opportunities.

✅ Track Your Income and Expenses – When you have clarity on where your money is going, you’ll feel more in control.

2. You Avoid Talking About Money

Do money conversations make you cringe? Do you dodge financial discussions with your partner, family, or friends? If talking about money makes you anxious, it’s a sign that you need to face your financial reality head-on.

How to Fix It:

✅ Start Small – Practice talking about money in non-stressful situations, like discussing a budgeting tip with a friend.

✅ Get Comfortable with Financial Literacy – Read books on money management or listen to finance podcasts to build your confidence.

✅ Have Honest Conversations – If you share expenses with a partner, set up a monthly “money check-in” to discuss spending, savings, and goals.

3. You Ignore Your Finances (Until It’s Too Late)

If you avoid checking your bank account, push off paying bills, or pretend your credit card balance doesn’t exist, you’re financially ghosting yourself. But ignoring money problems doesn’t make them disappear—it only makes them worse.

How to Fix It:

✅ Create a Weekly Money Ritual – Pick one day a week to review your accounts, track spending, and plan for upcoming expenses.

✅ Automate Your Finances – Set up automatic bill payments, savings transfers, and investment contributions so you stay on track without thinking about it.

✅ Face Your Financial Fears – The first step to improving your finances is knowing exactly where you stand. Log in, check your statements, and own your numbers.

4. You Regret Your Purchases (All the Time)

Ever bought something on impulse and instantly regretted it? If buyer’s remorse is a regular feeling, you may not be spending in alignment with your values or financial goals.

How to Fix It:

✅ Use the 24-Hour Rule – If you’re tempted to buy something non-essential, wait 24 hours before making the purchase. If you still want it (and can afford it), go for it!

✅ Follow the 50/30/20 Budget – Spend 50% on needs, 30% on wants, and save 20%. This balance ensures you enjoy life without financial guilt.

✅ Ask These 5 Questions Before Buying:

1. Does this align with my financial goals?

2. Will I still want or need this in a month?

3. Can I find it cheaper or secondhand?

4. Am I buying this out of boredom, stress, or peer pressure?

5. Will this purchase actually improve my life?

5. You Avoid Checking Your Bank Statements

If the thought of looking at your bank account makes your stomach turn, that’s a clear sign your relationship with money needs work. Ignoring your statements only leads to missed payments, overdraft fees, and mounting financial stress.

How to Fix It:

✅ Make Checking Your Finances a Habit – Log into your bank app daily, even if it’s just for 60 seconds. Awareness is key to financial control.

✅ Set Up Spending Alerts – Many banking apps let you set spending limits and notifications to help you stay within budget.

✅ Celebrate Small Wins – Did you save $20 this week? Pay off a little debt? Celebrate those wins! Progress builds momentum.

6. Money Stress Is Affecting Your Mental and Physical Health

If money problems keep you up at night, make you irritable, or strain your relationships, it’s time to take back control.

How to Fix It:

✅ Prioritize Financial Wellness – Treat financial health like physical health—take small daily actions to improve it.

✅ Create a Financial Plan – Set realistic goals for debt payoff, savings, and income growth. A clear plan reduces anxiety.

✅ Seek Support – Talk to a financial coach, listen to money podcasts, or join online finance communities to gain knowledge and motivation.

Your Next Step: Rewrite Your Money Story

If you resonated with any of these signs, don’t stress—you can transform your relationship with money. Here’s a simple but powerful exercise to help:

📝 Write a Letter to Money Imagine money is a person. Write a letter expressing how you feel about it. Be honest! Then, rewrite the letter as if money were a healthy, supportive partner in your life. This exercise can be incredibly eye-opening and healing.

🚀 Commit to One Positive Financial Habit This Week Pick one tip from this post and start today! Small shifts lead to big financial transformations.

Final Thoughts

Your relationship with money shapes your entire financial future. By recognizing unhealthy patterns and taking action, you can shift from financial stress to financial success. Remember, money isn’t your enemy—it’s a tool to create the life you want.

So tell me, what’s one thing you’re committing to change about your money mindset this week? Drop a comment below—I’d love to hear from you! 💬💰✨

Here are all of my favorite Smart Money Moves resources on Amazon! Smart Money Moves

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